The Search for Happiness

Nailed it.

Yesterday I had an awesome day. I hadn’t felt so happy in months – probably since December, when I was here in Brazil.

My boyfriend went to work a little later than usual, so we spent some time in bed cuddling and chatting after we woke up.

Have I mentioned how much I love Greek yogurt yet? Since I found out that light Greek yogurt is particularly rich in proteins and makes a healthy snack for when I get hungry at any time of the day but I don’t know what to have, I eat it every day and I can’t get enough! I’m having one right now.

After my fair doses of yogurt, I felt energized enough to spend some hours working on the translations I was assigned with. I’m telling you, it feels awesome to have a job I actually like and that I’m good at! It’s the first time I feel so sure of myself and of what I’m doing.

As you might have noticed, I skipped Psycho Tuesday this week. My Psychologist and I actually talked yesterday (Wednesday), and it was the best appointment. I understood so many things about myself in just one hour (one hour and a half, actually), I even felt overwhelmed after the session! I’m getting much better, not only about anxiety, but about a lot of issues, and I am very proud of myself.

Yesterday was also my boyfriend’s brother’s birthday. Since his mom asked me to bake a cake for him, I decided to make an experiment – not really the smartest choice, to make an experiment on the birthday of such a difficult person to please in matters of food – and try a chocolate cake with a soft and creamy chocolate heart. Well, it turned out very well! Yummy!

When we went out for dinner to celebrate, though, the birthday boy asked me to share a dessert, and naturally I couldn’t say no. We got a pizza that had banana and mozzarella on one half, and chocolate and M&Ms on the other. When it arrived, I got a slice of one half and slice of the other and put them together, face to face. I don’t like to repeat myself, but YUMMY!!!

Still, my cake (with green candles on it) was waiting on the dining-room table, together with a couple of chocolate bombs (you don’t want to know, you would gain 5 kilos just hearing the description of them) that my boyfriend’s mom had bought in the afternoon. We sang Happy Birthday, he opened his present, we tried the cake (for the third time: yummy) and went to bed, where my boyfriend stated he hadn’t seen me so happy in ages and asked me why I couldn’t stop smiling.

After a night of deep sleep, during which I had no nightmares and I didn’t even got up to pee – I still can’t believe this – I got up so relaxed… And that’s when it hit me: I lost the 100HappyDays challenge!!!

After the initial “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO” and disappointment, I came to realize that maybe it’s not such a bad thing. Let’s think about it.

You could find a happy moment in each and every one of your days without sharing it with the world. It is true, though, that having the commitment of a challenge in front of people who can check your results helps keeping up to it. But is it fair that we respect our commitment to happiness if other people are checking on us and we can’t do the same if we are our only witnesses?

And here is where my long speech against social networks – or better, against the use that most people do of social networks and what social networks try to make of us – would start, but I decided to spare it for another post and focus on the challenge now.

The thing is, can you really define yourself that happy, if in the middle of a so-called happy moment your mind goes to the social-network apps on your phone? I think the purpose of this challenge – helping people to focus on the happiness of every-day life – is good, but there’s a flaw in the system. This challenge is actually ask you to focus on something outside the happy moment, while the happy moment is taking place. Are you sure that’s happiness?

Probably, 71% of people taking this challenge actually are happier at the end of the 100 days: they are happier of the life they show off about, they are happier of the public record of their life. But think about it: when you think about all the happiness you have lived, is all you think about just that couple of pictures you keep in your photo album? Even more, is all you think about just those even-fewer pictures that you accurately selected from you photo album to show people whom in some cases you don’t even know that well? And now I ask you again: are you sure that’s happiness?

Yesterday I was so genuinely happy that the thought of opening Instagram and showing everybody how happy I was didn’t remotely touch my mind. Honestly, I think I won the challenge. I nailed it.

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One thought on “Nailed it.

  1. I completely agree with your thoughts on the happiness project. It’s not the project that makes you happy. I think the project puts a task in the mind to seek out happiness which will obviously make you happier wether or not you document it.

    Liked by 1 person

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